Monday, May 21, 2007

Being the Director of a billion dollar business is SOOO hard

Those goddamn radicals trying to organize my workplace, launching environmental campaign and suing McDonald's really hurt the economy. If we can't have economic growth, we will have to fire the crew and bribe the politicians to enact laws to stop workers from organizing. It is a huge pain. Those god damn commies, liberals and obese people, they never stop suing and organizing. Thank god we have money to pay them off, thank you WTO for allowing us to extend our operation to the Forbidden City in China. Thank you for corn subsidy and best of all, the right to privatize water in India and Bolivia, so we can supply tasty coca-cola to our customers.

Who cares about workers rights and the environment when we have cheap burgers for hungry children in the developing world to eat? We donate all kinds of left over to the third world. These countries must let us do business there, who doesn't want an awesome meaty burger? We need to establish McDonald's everywhere, including Mount Everest and the South Pole. Who wants to hunt whales when there is McDonald's right by their village? Who needs to preserve their culture when the golden Arch is so great?

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